Wednesday, 6 February 2013

I should have my own show or something

I haven't posted in like two days. Mainly because I was absolutely exhausted yesterday, having fought off a Sumo wrestler using some acrobatic Kung-Fu moves I didn't know I had, then sprinted 10km to safety because I was worried he would sit on  my face, causing me to die an excruciating death. (God, I really need to stop rambling. This didn't even make sense, not even to me. Plus it's not even true because the reason I was so tired was that I was functioning on two hours' sleep from the night before [having watched the entirety of Once Upon A Time overnight - OMG it's so good, you should check it out. Plus ladies, the guy who plays Captain Hook is ORGASMIC. Crap, what if my boyfriend Prince reads this? Nah it's fiiiiine, he knows I THINK HE'S REALLY SEXY *ahem*] [Yes, I've given Prince Charming the permission to read my blog], including a trip to the gym during which I may have pulled my arse).
 Captain Hook. FIT.

ANYWAY. What was I on about? Yesterday was a Good Day because I didn't binge nor stuck my fingers down my throat, which FELT SO DAMN GOOD! However, upon arriving home from the gym, I was tempted once by the Dominoe's voucher sitting in the hallway because it was 'Two for Tuesday' (Buy one, get one free) and I was so tired from having damaged my bum on the cross-trainer that I couldn't be arsed (pun intended HOHOHO God I'm hilarious) to cook. 

BUT I resisted the Dominoe's voucher! 'YAY!,' I hear you say in wondrous admiration, 'Princess, you are amazing and sexy and my life has been meaningless without you. Anyway, WELL DONE!' Why, thank you. Instead, I boiled two new potatoes, baked a fish cake and had a side of cos lettuce, carrots and tomatoes salad with balsamic vinegar and olive oil, all washed down with a cup of green tea. Needless to say, I was proud of myself, so proud and happy that I went up to bed and fell asleep a happy girl while reading my copy of The Host (Stephenie Meyer) I bought that day (OMG It's actually not bad! Having read all of the Twilight books [Stop judging me, OK??? I was curious at the time], I was scared her lack of talent would extend to the rest of her works but actually I'm pleasantly surprised thus far)

Today was good too, though I didn't manage to go to the gym before work because I'm a lazy bum and preferred sleeping in. Had a bowl of cereal for breakfast with pink grapefruit juice and green tea (not actually IN the cereal because that would be gross), then work, then checked out a museum with Prince Charming in Bond Street (I'm surprised he didn't make a run for it when I practically dragged him to Karen Millen and LK Bennett on the way there), had a coffee / sandwich break at Pret A Manger (seriously, Pret is AMAZEBALLS, it makes me want to wet myself it's so good. And it's actually pretty healthy. If you buy the healthy stuff, that is. Obviously if all you ever eat is their Chocolate Moose [which is OBVIOUSLY not my case... NOM NOM NOM] then yeah you're screwed. No seriously, I had the crayfish sandwich on bloomer bread).

Anyway, Prince Charming is sitting in my living room right now, and waiting for me so we can start cooking dinner (baked chicken breast with mushrooms and new potatoes, with lots of salad). Honestly, can't men manage on their own? Do they always expect us women to change their diapers? (Actually if Prince wore diapers, then I'd be seriously worried). Nah, just kidding, he's actually pretty good at doing EVERYTHING for me even doing my groceries, I'm surprised he doesn't mind that I make him sleep on the floor of the kitchen, on top of that. HAHAHAHA GOD I'M HILARIOUS, I SHOULD HAVE MY OWN SHOW OR SOMETHING.


  1. I love The Host!! It was really embarassing for me to start reading because everyone assumed it was like Twilight, but it's totally not! I just read it from a psych perspective rather than the silly-girl perspective.. if that makes sense.. Hah!

    Also, my boyfriend works at Domino's! So damn tempting ALL. THE. TIME. He gets it for free, too *palmface*

    That's cool that you let your Prince read your blog. I talk about my boyfriend too much to let him read mine...

    1. OMG IT'S SO GOOD! OK Yes I'm only like 20 pages in, having fallen asleep while reading but can't wait! I wonder whether the film will be any good? And the writing is actually much more substantial, you can tell it's more adult, which I'm excited about (not in the porn way, I mean).

      If my boyfriend worked at Domino's, I would probably be morbidly obese by now and he would have grown tired of rolling me around the streets like a giant football. GAHHH. Yeah I'm really open to Prince Charming about like everything, so when I started telling him about my bulimia, then I just let him in!

      Hope you're doing OK!!
      Princess xxx

  2. Really you're hilarious. I don't understand very well everything what you say (write), that's obvious, after all, speak Portuguese and I still need to learn much of their language [haha ']but I love how you count things that happen in your daily routine .. . always seems so excited, makes me happy too.
    Well, as the diet, I am not getting to eat everything that's on the menu, I get longer without eating than intended, is that of despair when it comes time to eat ... I prefer not to eat anymore, but I know I can't ...
    Don't cut myself more, I swear that I'd want, but remembered what you had said ...
    Thank you for your kindness.
    Keep well.

    1. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaanne, hello!

      I am glad someone finds me funny besides myself. Learn English by reading meeeeeeeeeeee - believe you me, you will not find a better English teacher! hehehe. I am quite excited about stuff - I think I let myself a bit down in descriptions of myself, especially in my first post where I say I have the self-esteem of a plankton (I do, but of an awesome, super-cool plankton).

      Yeah not eating is tough... how does that make you feel? Does it make you feel content or sad? Where do you think this is going, in the long-term? I'm so glad you don't cut anymore, that makes me so happy to hear :D

      I really hope you can find a way to be happy *hugs*

      Princess xxx

  3. Hey Princess, I just stumbled across your blog
    You are truly funny and yes I think you should have your own show
    I could be your quirky friend
    I love that you are able to have a sense of humour in the midst of your eating disorder
    I have to laugh too
    Sometimes it's the only thing that gets me through
    I'm also trying to recover from anorexia/bulimia
    There is a great community of people here to support you

    I'll look forward to reading more x

    1. I was thinking about a title for my show, how does that sound:

      "The Incredibly Interesting and Hilariously Awesome Life of The Sexy, Amazing, Intelligent, Beautiful, Talented, Nobel-Prize Winning, Nah We're Just Messing With You She's a Pullitzer, Did I Mention She Was Sexy... Smiley Princess"


      I think it has a certain ring to it. Pretty sure it would catch on pretty quickly too. How you doing today? And yes let's be friends!

      Princess xxx

  4. I love Once Upon a Time too! Although I haven't been keeping up with the second season so much... but I did get to some Captain Hook episodes and yes. He makes me blush.
    Good job with the no binging or purging! That's always worth a little celebration :)
    I also read the Host (and the Twilight books. And I liked them! Even though they were awful. So sue me XD). I don't know how far you are yet, but I would reserve judgment until the end. I started out thinking it was alright and by the end I was less enthralled.
    I love your sense of humor and this post really lifted my spirits. Have a good one!

    1. OMG! OK the first season is the best I think because the second one gets A BIT convoluted (like any programme after the first season, really) but my god it's so good anyway! Next ep is out on 10th Feb wooh I can't wait!

      Nah, I won't sue you because I don't have the money for a lawyer nor the energy but I will agree the Twilight books were entertaining!!

      Glad I made you laugh, though I'm scared about how The Host is gonna get boring....
      Princess xxx